Ha.

If you missed last night's little post, boy are you missing out. It was... er... special. But it is gone now and it is not coming back, so if you saw it, just count yourself lucky.

Subject Change

Yesterday at Shopko I saw two teenage girls buying pregnancy tests. That's right. Not one pregnancy test, but two. My first thought was "Jackpot!" and I truly almost talked to them. After almost running them down with my shopping cart of course. (I just can't help myself.) But how do you start that conversation?

"So... Bun in the oven?"
"Boy, sure hope you're knocked-up!"
"Dibs!"


So instead I just sort of followed them around for a while. I felt like I was letting a great opportunity pass, though I still don't know what I could have done that wouldn't have been weird/creepy.

So then I got in line to checkout. I was telling Harrison to stop grabbing everything off the shelves and the old man ahead of me in line turned around and looked at me. I smiled and looked away (like normal people do) but he just kept staring. I looked up again really quick to see if he was really still looking, and yep, he was. I could feel his eyes boring into me. It wasn't like he was a sweet old guy suffering from dementia. He was all there. I thought maybe he disapproved of me telling Harrison no, but I really don't know, and I couldn't think anymore with those eyes penetrating my calm! I tried not to look up at him anymore, but it was like my eyes were drawn to his by some unexplained power, and each time our eyes met, there he was, stone-faced, still staring at me. Just when I thought I would scream under his gaze, he finally turned around. Gees! It must have been a good 45 seconds. That is like an eternity in staring years! What was his deal?